Classified Classics is where you'll find boats listed for sale that I think are either bargains or beaters. I like to find hidden gems, worthwhile projects or good deals. I also like to call out rip-offs, so beware. The classified section can be both entertaining and informative
October 26, 2022
The paperwork on your second divorce is finalized. You got a decent chunk of change selling your car that you can’t drive because of that god damn third DUI, which was only blocks from your house, can you believe these cops. Now you’re ready to start fresh, you want everyone to know you’re back in business, but nothing too loud, subtle is the name of the game. Here it is, the 1987 Donzi Z-25, a well styled sport boat, looks sharp still. The brand still has some cache, that way you sound like you might have your life together when you mention having it. Don’t talk about it too much before you actually know someone, you’ll sound desperate. Nobody needs to know about the DUIs and restraining orders, that’s the old you, this is the new you. A bright yellow 30 year old Donzi Z-25 with a refreshed MerCruiser can make life way better when things look grim.
The graphics aren’t my favorite but I do love a 28’ Skater. This is pretty nice, you could skip any waitlist and get on the water immediately and there isn’t much else like this Skater 28’ on the market as far as a true tunnel sub 30’ footer.
The Checkmate 21 Starflite is a classic. These aren’t the fastest hulls around but they look great and with a big 250 Yamaha SHO, it should move pretty good. If you read the ad though, the engine isn’t included, so the $6,500 looks pretty steep. Imagine any 1987 American car, with no engine worth $6,500? I can’t think of one either. Used boat sellers are worse than ambulance chasing lawyers.
This is an absolute classic vintage sport boat. If you’re a classic boat person, this would be worth restoring at any cost. I feel like some of the boats from this era had such radical designs compared to now. All the new boats look the same, this thing looks like aliens from another planet designed it.
I haven’t seen one of these in a while but there was one near me where I grew up and I think they’re super cool. This is a project but for sure worth it. The idea of a mini tunnel with a little 40 HP is awesome. If someone was an entrepreneur I think making a mold of this would be a great idea. I love small boats.
I love boats of all kinds. Sometimes I’ll spot something while driving on a highway and pull a U turn to take a look. That said, this is one of the strangest boats I’ve ever seen. Howards are great boats overall and have made some great models over the years. Center consoles aren’t super popular on lakes around California and Arizona, and this looks like a one off. What I love, sterndrive CC, that’s a great combination. The console and seating around the console look cool. Even though I don’t love open boats for sport boats, this is pretty damn cool.
A triple outboard 33’ Scarab. Where do I wire the money? Seriously, just send the money and pick it up. No survey, no inspection, don’t ask your wife, better yet don’t get married in the first place. Honestly, marriage is one of the biggest decisions you’re going to make in your life. Take your time and get to really know your partner. Make a list of your definite non starters; if they have one of your non starters, just break it off. Meet their family, do you like them? Do they like you? Do they even like each other? Be honest with yourself about what you really want. People don’t change, they will bring all their positive and negative baggage with them, so wait for the honeymoon phase to be long gone before you make it official. It’s a big deal getting married, don’t settle. And remember, most murders are actually spouse to spouse, and 80% of murder for hire cases are on the persons spouse. Any murder case, guess who the first suspect is? But, when it comes to boats, roll the dice. Who cares, what’s the worst that could happen.
May 13, 2022
You hate to be negative but this old Progression has a lot working against it. First, the color scheme is pretty bad unless your color blind or just blind. Yellow and purple looks good on a Jimi Hendrix album cover, not a boat. Second, and even worse is the open bow. What an absolute crime that they made this in an open bow. I don’t care how much the customer wants you to cut out the bow of your boat, you don’t build a bowrider, ever. No reputable performance boat builder builds bowriders. Again, I hate to be negative but I hate this boat.
I don’t know anything about this, other than it looks like a copy of a the ubiquitous 24’ 7” hull design that was popular by many brands down here in Miami. I think it looks really cool but it is impossible to value these things. I always go back to cars as a vague comparison. What 1980 mediocre car is worth $15,000 now? The answer is none. If it were an original Cigarette or something notable, then you can start to price in some brand value but this is a boat only a small number of people know, it’s over 30 years old and not a high demand style. Very tough market for this.
I love the caption and I wonder how much money he owed? If it was more than $50, I’m not sure he was your friend. That’s the tough thing about life and friends. Sometimes you never know who your real friends are until a crisis hits. What limit would you put on your friendships? They say you’re as good as the closest 5 people in your life. What amount of money is too much? What crime is too far to defend a friend? I think if a “friend” left this in my yard, I would probably have them killed. I like to keep my friends close and my enemies even closer.
February 14, 2022
What a great classic Fountain. I don’t know a ton about the old Fountains, but I know many were quite fast and built reasonably well. This boat checks a lot of boxes as a repower candidate because it looks pretty clean overall. The biggest question is do you want to go with big blocks are rethink the boat and put on a bracket for outboards? Twin 300 or 400 HP outboards would be great on here. I’m torn, I do like an OB conversion, this one has some of the work done already, but on a true classic I do like it to be somewhat original. I’d say go with twin big blocks, keep it close to original. I’d also get a few black track suits, some costume jewelry for a Mr. T starter pack, and invest in some pomade and start greasing my hair back. You can’t go wrong here.
I don’t know much about Manta but I do know they made race boats in South Florida for a time and had a popular 28’, I assume this is the same hull. Normally I’m not a center console fan but I do like the cuddy cabin center console this has. Makes the boat infinitely better. My bet is this is built like a tank and runs pretty good. To me the center console is one of the worst designs for recreational boating and definitely a poor design for performance boats. They have have poor seating arrangements, lose structural integrity, and are ugly. Making an exception here because it’s basically a close bow CC.
When I see old offshore boats like this I get a headache. It says NINJA on the side of the boat but it should say NIGHTMARE. I just know its going to need almost everything to run again. This might actually make a good outboard conversion, I think we’re going to see more and more classic offshore boats become outboard rebuilds. If the hull is sound and the engines are already out, it makes it an even easier decision.
I love this ad, especially the last part “one tire doesn’t hold air.” Believe me, that’s the least of your problems here. In all honesty, I’ve seen people spend $450 on way worse things. I think this is a little jet boat, if you bought it and found a PWC engine and jet drive, I think you could have a ball with it. Even if you spend $1800 all in to get it running, I’ve seen guys spend that on way worse things. Hell, spend $3k and even paint it a wild color for laughs. I’ve seen guys spend $3k on way worse things. In fact, I’ve seen guys spend double that to have someone killed, only to be caught up in a murder for hire sting and serve serious time while ruining their life and their entire families life. Would you rather be in a federal prison or buzzing around the lake in a beater jet boat having a blast? This thing is starting to look like a bargain at $450.
A lot of people really like these boats, based on a popular 24’ by 7’ configuration and with a deep deadrise, the 24’ Superboat was a great little wave crusher. I think a bit of a resto with a big single outboard would be really cool. This size is perfect for todays heavier engines.
God I hate bowriders, the epitome of bad design. It seems like an even worse idea on a bigger boat. And part of me thinks this boat should be way better than it is. The guys at Formula got really lazy when they started to build outboard boats and put brackets under the swim platform on their existing boats. They look like an afterthought and outboards don’t really suit this design. A closed bow sterndrive version of this boat is much nicer. That said, Formula seems to do okay, mostly because the competition is even worse, so as far as what’s on the market, this isn’t too bad. The state of the marine industry is very confusing sometimes.
There’s an amazing thing that happens in life that is biological and unfair. When women age, some do very gracefully and remain attractive for a long time but many don’t, and as awful as it sounds, middle age puts them on the downward trend of that phenomenon. With Men, it’s not really the same case from a female to male attraction perspective; often men get better with age. So there is this tragic occurrence when a model, celebrity, or just the most attractive women you knew when you were young start to fade. At one time, some of those women would’ve been out of your league, but with enough time, as your attractiveness is going up, there is an inflection point. All of a sudden, the best looking model or the best looking girl you knew isn’t as attractive as you are. She’s a washed up Pam Anderson and you’re more like Richard Gere, getting better with age. I think with this 37 year old Skater, it’s time to make your move.